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The Pitch
by Don Silver
November 2004
From: Aaron
To: Jerry N., CBS
Jerry, what would you say if I told you I could deliver 55,000,000 television viewers to CBS for the first episode of a new show? You'd say, “bring it on!” wouldn't you?
Introducing: “Shadow Government”: Reality TV meets the election of 2004, starring John Kerry and John Edwards as president and vice president of the United States (we plan to share set costs with the West Wing), showing the nearly-elected administration behind closed doors setting policy, wrangling with Republicans, and responding to real world events as they happen!
Think about it—Republicans running the country with real time live input from the Democrats. The Bush Administration caters to the base, and we bring regular people to the cash registers. I guarantee you this will change politics!
I'm still waiting to hear back from the Edwards camp. I'd like to open with Elizabeth and the whole breast cancer thing. Take the cameras into the waiting room, get close with the family, do the biopsy like it was CSI Miami—get the cells swimming around in a Petri dish … I want something that will hook women, something people can rally around. We can bring men in later with something technical, like global warming. Get the big movie studios and the music industry to sponsor it—“only emit gas at home in front of your TV” (he-he!).
I've talked with the Kerry people. They want to open with something strong and presidential—a ceremony with a foreign dignitary, a secret meeting at Camp David, a candid moment on Air Force One. Who can blame them? Their guy's had a tough week.
I know what you're thinking. World Leaders. Will they participate? Will they be funny? Can you even do subtitles in prime time? This will NOT be a problem. My people have feelers out to Castro, Qaddafi and Chirac. We can get them AFTRA passes, use a split screen, solid color backgrounds—the whole nine yards. I picture Putin, Blair and Sharon once the ratings kick in. The Bush people will love watching Kerry try stuff, stealing what works and taking the credit.
Jerry, there are a million details to work out, but the bottom line is: we can't let the 55,000,000 people who voted for John Kerry down! You had real emotion there. You had a sense this mattered. You had a character people seemed to care a little bit about. Christ, my own kids were for Kerry. If we can get this on the air fast enough, Jerry, half the country will have something to hope for again.
What we need now is vision. A network with a big view. Obviously, Fox isn't going to do this. Let me be blunt with you. After the Dan Rather thing, you people aren't going to be invited into the White House for a long time. You need something edgy, racy, post-modern. This creates a new front line and puts your people on it. You'd be influencing the news and reporting it. Give me a call, buddy. This is too hot to let simmer. I have meetings scheduled tomorrow with the other networks that I'd just as soon cancel.
Yours, Aaron
Don Silver's first novel will be released next fall by Ecco Press. He lives in Philadelphia.
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